You might be surprised if you hear your child ask another “How many minutes do you want that toy, item, until I can have it?” Yet, many parents choose Indianola Children's Center because we take an active role in teaching effective peaceful conflict resolution and peaceful communication.

Indianola Children's Center prides itself on the partnership with The Interfaith Center For Peace (ICP), and teaching, encouraging and practicing peaceful conflict resolution and non-violent communication. ICP conducts a summer Peace Camp, sponsors interns to do peacemaking activities, as well as provides us with a wealth of resources, knowledge and expertise. We also keep parents/families up to date on any community and educational events, such as those sponsored through Compassionate Communication of Central Ohio who often offer free and affordable events for families, couples and parents.

It's funny how sometimes parents will (begrudgingly) admit to fighting at home with their partner and their ICC child stops them from an argument or fight by saying “we don't talk to each other like that. What are you going to do instead?” Children are amazing adept at learning the peaceful conflict resolution model. Often, it is the group playground time or sharing an activity that lend us a hand to teaching children how to ask, make requests, share, and solve problems. Children learn to talk to each other, share feelings, explore non-violent options, and “make up” after mean words, hitting, pushing, biting, etc. It takes a consistent effort on the part of parents and staff to reinforce peaceful conflict resolutions.

If you'd like to practice these steps at home with your family, here's is a simple model offered to us by the Interfaith Center for Peace:

1. Stop and Think 2. Listen and Talk 3. Decide What to Do

  Step 1: Helpful Hints: Take a breath. Slow down. Be mindful. Make Eye Contact.
  Step 2: Helpful Hints: Take Turns – one person talk while the other listens. Then switch. Ask the other person to repeat what message they heard.
  Step 3: Helpful Hints: Allow your child to come up with alternatives and solutions. Only after letting them identify some ideas, you might "help" by adding some that fit with your family and discipline.

The other part of peaceful conflict resolution is helping children by “catching them” doing the right behaviors, saying the right words, following peaceful, non-violent ways. Praise and reinforce what they are doing that is working.

We also do our best to remember and remind parents that this is a learning process. We always keep in mind that this is a toddler, a 3 year old, 4 or 5 year old, or school-aged child. They are learning. Perhaps, we, too are learning this way of speaking, acting, communication, and being. Thanks for your collective commitment to using and reinforcing this model.